Create your home.

Photo by Elly Fairytale on

The home is our sanctuary. It is were we come to rest, to heal, to find love and peace, laughter and play with our families. It should have family members making up a small tribe that supports you, helps you reach your potential, raise your vibration.

Everything you bring in this home and to your tribe is crucial. Everything carries a vibration and energy. When you bring it in the home the vibration or energy it has been marinating in will change the energy of the home, will effect the tribe.

I learned this when we fostered for a brief time. Nothing is as simple as it appears in physical form. There is a whole life to it that we can’t see or grasp but we feel it.

It is important to purge and cleanse the home of all things that don’t feel good or right. No need to analyze or question it…that only keeps things the same. Pass it on. Others may not be effected by this piece of furniture or clothing.

Cleaning the house, saging, opening windows for fresh air, filling the home with light, and high vibrational music is important.

I love Christian music or Cuban music. It is very high vibration. I find myself smiling and getting into my cooking and cleaning.

Studying spiritual works, be it the Bible or Zen, Buddhism, or Metaphysics. Whatever feels good and light filled for your soul.

Decorating your home in colors and furnishings that cause happy feelings.

When I did our first walk through of this house after purchasing, I was depressed. I knew we had to strip it and paint it. And we did. Then the old furniture looked too big, awkward and shabby. The bamboo floors had gaps, the white paint created a gloom instead of a brightness I had envisioned. Bali fixed the floors, we painted every room and hall warm and cheerful colors, I gave away all the furniture, paintings, huge lamps. I brought in smaller, nicer furnishings, only one lovely lamp to light the living room in a warm glow.

I now love my home. But it took work and thought and washing, scrubbing, hauling bags, boxes, and large pieces out of the house. It took searching, making some cash to purchase gently used items.

The way my home looked before with it’s lack of color, the messed up floors, the odd furniture…it created discontent and that feeling didn’t go with my morning coffee. Now my home delights me and I love to wander through all 1,000 sq ft with a steaming cup of joe. I take pride in all the lovely, simply items I hand selected. I take pride in all the work my husband and I did to make it bright and beautiful. I take pride in that I spent very little and did it sustainably.

It is just as important to be cautious of who we bring into our homes. Sometimes we must purge old relationships or create some space until we know what the truth is for us in that relationship. Some people drain us. We have all had that person that we spend time with and after they leave we feel depressed and heavy. I’ve had visits that the person left feeling good but I was up all night fearful of the world and politics of this day and age.

I sort of like the sheltering in. I get to nest with my brood and only occasionally invite a person or two into our home if my energy is up and I’m prepared in my mind and heart to receive guest. I enjoy people very much but I prefer the delightful chats I have with strangers in the produce section or bread isle of the store. It is very non committal and a small dose of connection with the community. I adore my neighbors but I keep it light. If they need anything we are here to help, we all watch over each other but it seems we are all working on some big, emotional stuff right now so we give each other the space.

Of course some people come right on in the yard, settle in the kitchen and stay awhile not by our choice but we wind up making them family in short time. I even have a bottle of wine I stash just for one of these neighbors. She chose us and we adore her now.

Cooking good food that is nutritious and has wonderful flavor makes a home. When we move into a new place, the first thing we do is fill the fridge and pantry and start cooking and baking immediately to create that cozy ambiance. I love nothing more than a day in the kitchen listening to a good seminar on a topic I enjoy and making bread by hand along with some large batch cooking for the week. It is an all day process but it ensures a few days of easy meal preparation so I can focus on my writing or just being out and about.

Photo by Lucie Liz on

The more I fill my house with comfortable furniture and natural things such as wooden bowls, candles, plants, and a little bit of nature that the boys bring inside in the form of colorful rocks, acorns, feathers, and odd shaped pieces of wood for the forest, the more the homes feels rustic and peaceful like a walk in the woods.

There is nothing like a fresh, clean house with that smell of Ajax. Or that fat, glowing candle on the table that smells of cinnamon rolls. Maybe a little pan of cinnamon sticks and cloves in water simmering on low at the back of the stove.

So, if your home doesn’t feel good right now or you aren’t loving being there, give it a good scrub and tidy up. Do some decluttering. Cook some delicious food in your kitchen. Light a candle or two. I like to have one in the bathroom and one on the dining room table. Play some nice music in the background or a movie. Sometimes I have TV on just as a background noise. I’m one of the weirdos that like the color, images and laugh tracks in my living room by playing a sitcom. I usually don’t even watch the TV with full attention.

Fill that pantry and fridge with good stuff. Bake a cake on Saturday night just because it’s Saturday night.

Photo by cottonbro on


  1. Love it. Focusing on your own home rather than minding what others are doing is the way to go. Years ago when my children were little and I was a stay at home mom, there was no internet, social media, etc. We did focus on our homes. Sure there were people that were busy bodies and trying to keep up with the Jones’, but I think we were a lot more grounded back then. Your blog brings a little of that back. Reminds us to be in the moment. In our own homes. I just got that book “ Sweeping Changes” by the way. Looks intriguing! Hope you have some blue skies in your neck of the woods today. We actually have some blue sky today instead of all that smoke yay! Have a good weekend!

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Just a perfect blog for a saturday afternoon. Our homes keeps us warm, shelters us from the elements, keeps us safe. It makes sense that we respect the space we live in by keeping it clutter free, clean and tidy. In order for us to have healthy, fulfilling lives, our homes, the place where we spend most of our time, needs nurturing too . We have to love the space we live in. I too believe that things and people that enter our homes, bring in different kinds of energy. This is one of the things that I do to cleanse our home. Before mopping the floors I always add some sea salt to the water. You Tube has plenty of videos on removing negative energy. Thank you Kate. Take care.

    Liked by 4 people

  3. I am a homebody for sure. I love to be around people but only when I want to. We have good neighbors on both sides and across the street who we talk to almost daily and we all look out for each other.. I feel so relaxed when I am at home with my family or just puttering around. Autumn is the time of year I do “Spring” cleaning. I’ve been decluttering, scrubbing and vacuuming, going room by room. Each time a room is finished I feel lighter. A cluttered, untidy house stresses me out.

    Liked by 5 people

  4. Nice to see a new post, I just sat down. I processed a ton of produce. I love the oil diffusers we have in all our rooms, so much safer. Our Golden upsets the candle. She attacks them, so weird. Tonight’s stay at home date night on the good dishes for my husband and I on the front porch with good music. Pizza and movie for the kiddos with vegan ice cream sodas. Have a wonderful evening everone

    Liked by 4 people

  5. My home is my sanctuary. I have now committed to part time caregiving for my mom. I love her dearly but she is so negative. My husband is very patient but her energy is very draining. I usually have her 2-3weeks on, one month break. I see she is declining someone (shes 83) And I think she assumes I’ll just be her caregiver full time eventually. I do have teens at home, work as teachers aid part time. I’m normally upbeat, positive, I try and live simply, but she always has comments on everything.
    Honestly Kate, can’t tell you how much reading and watching your channel has helped. I’m carefully placing boundaries, and being vocal with her when she goes on her negative comments. And I will definitely burn sage after she leaves. It’s tough because I do see how it affects not only myself, my boys as well. Thank you Kate!!

    Liked by 3 people

  6. I was feeling down about my house because I have a small kitchen but this post inspired me to shine it up and make a pan of squares for my family.

    Liked by 3 people

  7. I LOVE being at home.

    I just read about something called the “joy score” as to it’s relation to home projects. Apparently, the joy score is higher and more lasting for projects done by self as opposed to hiring a professional to do most of it.

    That might be part of the reason I love my home so much. We started out with NO running water, no septic tank, almost no electricity, no countertop, 47 concrete steps up to our home we had to replace before winter hit, one bedroom [murphy beds all over the place] and absolutely no home maintenance for a good 75, 80 years.

    Everything but the septic tank we did ourselves. We built a bathroom, 2 more bedrooms, 2 closets, restored a fireplace, put in a cheap countertop which we painted and no one can believe it’s not granite.

    People from our village come to our house, incredulous at the differences we have made. Friends who see it for the first time say “Now I know why you said its’ a fixer-upper.” So, we still have a ways to go, but that doesn’t keep me from loving this home more than any other we have lived in.[ though living in the mountains on the side of a mountain doesn’t hurt]

    I would never have guessed I would be spending so much of my retirement life sanding floors and putting up sheet rock. [that’s one messy job]

    And, like you Kate, I love baking the breads and cakes for my family.

    I added a bit to my “joy score” today. Our home is dark brown with white trim and some blue. In front of everything is our big old clunker of a propane tank. It was light green with a dark green lid. It is also was peeling, discolored and just made for atrocious “curb appeal.” In our contract with the propane company we agreed not to paint our tank [ as many people, we rent the tank] I calld the company and told them that it needed repainting. I said that I would do it, but would paint the tank white and the lid blue. They told me to “go for it.” And I did. My “joy score” at home hit a new peak today.

    Liked by 7 people

  8. Kate, those people, for whatever reason, choose to rip you apart. It is not you. It is them. That is their milieu. Unfortunately, with all their group inadequacies,they are still adept at finding others’ deepest vulnerabilities and taking advantage.They WANT to see you in a hideous light. There is NOTHING you can say or do that will change that. You know that. That is their problem. Please do not make it yours.


  9. Shoeshirt, the same thing said to Sarah Grant refers to you…you are hysterical. It’s obvious that you and those like you have very negative minds and lives. The fact that you could read this entire post and then say that Kate referred to her foster daughter as a thing (or clutter) is ludicrous. You just keep on being negative and critical and creepy and see where that gets you in life. Oh, and by the way, do it on your own page, not this one.

    Liked by 3 people

  10. I love you all for this but I have Spammed all the nasty comments and will be Spamming all these people from now on to keep our site clean. I got sucked in for a minute but Vicki reminded me to not deal with insanity. I have deleted all the wonderful and protective comments as well because the toxic comments are gone now.

    Liked by 3 people

  11. My home is my sanctuary as well. Our temperatures suddenly changed like a light switch from hot and muggy 90s to 40s at night, 50s or 60s during the day! TIme for fall decorating and digging out sweaters, jackets. I’m making soups and enjoying my pellet stove, enjoying the yardsale and antiquing here in New England, realizing winter will soon be here.

    Liked by 3 people

  12. If one good thing comes from 2020 is the fact that I’ve slowed down long enough to cherish my home and my family. We’ve repainted rooms, added furnishings that delight us, and keep it sparkling clean. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  13. I think sheltering in has given us the time to deal with emotions we have been avoiding. I too am purging things, relationships and more. Great post, Kate.
    Valerie in SC

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Yes Kate…I could have wrote this myself…I agree…we r in the middle of some remodeling off the kitchen and i can not wait to purge, organize and clean it all up when its done…make a nice meal & enjoy our new full pantry…right now everything is crowded in our front porch and its driving me nuts…lol…I’m not one to invite people into my home unless I really really vibe with them…i too enjoy the chit chats at the grocery store with a random stranger or the quick smile as we busily cross paths…feels good…covid mess has ruined all that…I pray someday soon we can take the masks off, smile at one another and lightly socialize again ♡


  15. I just feel the lightness in your writing now. Purging things that bring us down is a good thing. I love color too and have filled my house with robin’s egg blue, turquoise, olive green and red….it just pops! Our home is our nest, where we cook together, read together, watch movies, listen to music and just BE.


  16. I feel such a lightness in your writing now! I love to fill my home with many colors and it just makes me happy. Our home is our nest where we read, binge watch Netflix series and movies, listen to music, cook together and just BE. Keep shining your light, dear Kate! Love, peace and blessings!


  17. Loved this blog! Also, all the comments. Great ideas on what makes a house a home. You and Bali have done a great job of creating a home that is beautiful, joyful and a place for nurturing the whole family.


  18. Awesome topic

    You’ve done a fine job hygge-izing your house, that is, making it cozy and a soft place for your “tribe” to fall. So important. The other day my grown son said that as he was making his coffee he looked around the kitchen and said it reminded him of a cozy bagel shop. LOL. I was hoping for a cafe, but I’ll take it. It was a compliment totally out of the blue.

    A lot of what you write about in this piece piques my interest. The energy of old things. Rearranging, improving the flow or “chi” of a home.

    Some friendly (never pushy) suggestions for future topics: Feng shui and hygge. Both are right up your alley. The library should have a few good books on the topics.

    Music, color, scents, lighting, and how a house’s arrangement flows is so important and yet often overlooked. I am so glad you ditched the oversized furniture. I wanted you to kick it to the curb a long time ago haha. What you have now is perfect. The new furniture pieces, esp. the cabinet next to the fridge is just right. Well done.

    Side note: I thought that picture at the top of this post with the little blue and white dotted creamer was your photo. I thought “omg! She’s got a piece of Polish pottery!” Love me some Polish pottery for its folk art vibe.


  19. Lol, I love the cafe look, don’t know what the bagel shop look is except Noah’s bagels. I love the whole Feng Shui and Hygge thing and have read up. I’m definitely Hygge. I have my theories on Feng Shui and will share soon, thank you for the suggestions!


  20. To be happy at home is the ultimate result of all ambition, the end to which every enterprise and labour tends, and of which every desire prompts the prosecution.”
    Samuel Johnson (November 10, 1750)

    Liked by 1 person

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