Coffee chat time. Alright, I have to post this as there are now so many comments it will take me all day to respond and I have chores, people!
I have been harassed for years. Nasty reviews, trolls, creepy crawlies. This is a part of YouTube and being a writer. The good does outweigh the bad and that is what keeps us going. The weirdos are a handful but they are like crazy venomous snakes that keep at it.
I should never have gone on that site and I never will again. If they want to waste precious hours of life dissecting and criticizing others instead of creating good things to inspire others and societal solutions…so be it.
As for me, I have a thick skin. The first few times were unsettling, after awhile you ignore it. Then you laugh because some of the nasty comments are so stupid. I had one person refer to my “puppet lined mouth” I had to ponder that for a minute. One woman said a book of mine was a waste of two hours of life and then proceeded to take another hour of her life to dissect and complain about every chapter. Another women said my sobriety book would make one want to drink.
I actually find some of these comments and insults humorous.
But right now I’m tired, tired, tired. I have things to deal with at home. Fostering is sucking the life out of me. I’m entering my “second Spring” as the Chinese say, and I need to just focus on one particle at a time.
I will not take any of my blog or YouTube down. I will not disappear (well, for a little bit). I will not stop sharing because of a handful of twits that are obsessed with me.
However, I do need a long vacation. I have a stack of novels that need reading as I keep renewing them at the library and I’m running out of renewals. I need to focus on the kids. Schooling has begun and I need to get them up and running. I would also like to do some soul searching alone. I love to share but there is a time in all our lives when we need to isolate and cocoon so we may fully develop into a new and lovely form.
I see myself learning new dishes, playing with plant based recipes, sitting with stacks of gardening books and honing my gardening skills, taking the kids for long walks in the forest, joining the Goodreads book reading challenge and actually doing it this time…oh wait, I already joined and I’m 49 books behind. I see myself walking everywhere with kids and dogs, slimming down, working on the funky front yard, painting the last bedroom, watching interesting documentaries, purging and gifting others with more things that crowd our space.
I see us having more social visits, dinners with neighbors on the porch (we are doing minestrone and sourdough tonight), and playdates on all our amazing trails.
I just have this strong desire to shut this laptop and be completely present in my life with all my loved ones. To not take in any of the outside world, to not be poisoned with gossip darts and to have some peace.
Then I will return rested and the wind back in my sails. As we all know, if we are empty we have nothing to give. I’m actually too full and busy and need to empty and refuel.
So, in a nutshell, the channel and blog remain but I’m on vacation for some time.
When I return I don’t want to speak of or give any energy to anything or anyone unpleasant. We will continue to inspire each other as a community, to build our lovely and supportive community and thrive. The other people will continue their unpleasantries but they will only have each other in their dark gloom and eventually they will move on to other, fresh prey. And what we put out does come back. Remember that, every action has a reaction. Every period of sowing is followed by a harvest.
See you all soon!